High Protein: memoirs of a boom op part...
The following is a log of selected text messages between me and Sadie
Day 3
Me: (8:45p) Haha the DP on this shoot always wears crocs
Sadie: Wow, those are hideous
Me: (10:52p) Yes, I don't think those were ever in fashion...still waiting to shoot I hate this shit
Day 4
Sadie: How late did you go last night?
Me: (1:23p) Like 3am. I am on set now...call was ten...I showed at noon and we aren't even close to shooting yet obv...I'm guessing we don't start shooting until 5.
Sadie: That's so fucked up....what are they even doing?
Day 5
Me: (4:23p) call time was 9...guess what...still haven't shot anything.
Me: (5:32p) Oh man, this is amazing. We are at a park with no permit, ready to shoot, but they forgot the mustache for the actor, and the actresses are smoking pot right now.
Me: (5:46p) This one girl's wearing a see through robe and her tits are basically out in the open and families with kids are driving by. She is so gross...like the epitome of trashy porn star: bleach blonde, orange, way too much makeup, and looks like a tranny.
Sadie: Anyone have hard ons?
Me: Maybe this one retarded PA
Sadie: delicious! delicious! hahaha that's so gross
Me: Omgzerz Robert Downey Jr. just jogged by
Me: (6:48p) Ranger kicked us off obv...I called that when we pulled up
Sadie: hahahahaha where the fuck is this park
Me: You should also know that the sound guy for today was also the DP for Bikini Carwash 2
Me: 90 percent sure Robert Downey Jr. called the rangers on us
Day 7
Me: (1:02p) Omg I am so tired I think I have cancer
Me: This is so ridiculous, the actors are taking this so serious, talking about motivations, metaphors, and foreshadowing....it's going to be a long day, I can tell :(
Sadie: Hanging in there?
Me: Just like the cat on the poster
Me: (6:20p) This is the absolute most ridiculous thing ever conceived...the old actors both got so pissed and started yelling...this guy smells like urine, and there was more unnecessary bottle breaking. (8:48p) This is so frustrating listening to them do all this setting up for such a piece of shit. Sage is fucking higher than ever, delaying things and the actors are debating everything.
Sadie: close to wrapping yet :/?
Me: (10:40p) Might be done by midnight...I want to walk so bad
Day 8
Me: I think this is a hidden camera reality show or something
Sadie: ahahahaha I wish, but it is not
Sep 21st